Ads during Sunday’s Super Bowl cost an
average of $3.8 million for a 30-second spot, up from last year's $3.5 million.
The 2013 offerings, like last year, showed scantily clad women and people being slapped and knocked down.
Adding to the violence of the ads and the game of football itself were ads for movies, such as “Ironman 3,” and TV shows, such as “How I Met Your Mother,” which showed hitting, punching, slapping, and explosions.
At halftime, Beyoncé wore a skimpy costume, as did the couple of dozen of women who performed with her. Then she writhed around on the floor of the stage. The performance added to the sexist atmosphere of the Super Bowl.
I did like one ad: Dodge, in advertising its Ram pickup, offered an ad about the importance of farmers, narrated by Paul Harvey.
Here are my awards for the worst ads airing
during this year’s Super Bowl:
Two guys in a library whisper, then fight about what’s best in an Oreo cookie, the cookie or the cream. The fight spreads throughout the entire library, and the police drive through the wall to break up the fights.
In an ad for SABMiller Redd’s Apple Ale, a guy can’t decide what to order, so an apple is thrown at him, knocking him down. Then he knows he should order Redd’s Apple Ale.
In Audi’s ad, a teen gets the keys to the Audi to drive to the prom. He marches in and steals a kiss from the queen and gets punched by the king.
Budweiser’s ad, with the man who trained a Clydesdale that later broke away from his team of horses during a Chicago parade to hunt the man down, ranks as silly, in my opinion.
Also silly was Tide’s ad featuring a salsa stain on a shirt that looked like a football player. Dozens of people came to look at the “miracle,” with the man’s wife washing the shirt and saying “Go, Ravens.”
A man who loves Doritos buys a goat who loves them, too. By the end of the ad after the goat has eaten hundreds of packages of the chips, the guy’s hoarding them and making a for-sale sign for the goat.
Stretchers, a tennis shoe, shows a man outrunning a cheetah and tying him up, thus saving an antelope.
Last year, Go Daddy.com showed two guys in the “cloud” populated with scantily clad women. This year, it grossed out a lot of people by showing a sexy model kissing a nerd with awful sloppy sounding kissing.
In another Go Daddy.com ad, also sexist, wives around the world are harping to their husbands for not putting their big idea online.
Fiat’s ad slowly panned over a woman lying on the beach in a bikini was bad enough, but having a scorpion crawl over her? Yuck. Then, when she sees the car, she stands up and throws off her bikini top. The scorpion drags it away.
Motorola's cell phone ad features actress Megan Fox in a bathtub. Two men slap each other and another falls off a ladder looking at the phone.
A Doritos ad shows a little girl bribing her dad to play her with a bag of chips. He dresses up and puts on makeup, as do four of his friends.
Gliden, t-shirt maker, produced an ad showing a man trying to sneak out after a one-night stand, which included fuzzy handcuffs, only the woman is sleeping in his favorite t-shirt.
Century 21’s ads don’t show women in a good light either. A woman is so taken with her new wealth that she doesn’t see that her husband is choking, a woman in labor demands a new kitchen, and a mother-in-law is so awful that a groom faints at the altar when he thinks about living with her.
Calvin Klein’s ad showed a male model in nothing but underwear for most of the ad. Objectifying men isn’t any better than objectifying women.
Best Buy’s ad showed Amy Poehler asking dozens of questions, and making suggestive comments to the sales associate.
In a Coke ad, a bus full of chorus girls chases toward a giant bottle of Coke, with other characters. One of the girls shoots a cannon full of something that sounds bad but floats down lightly at the cowboys. And, a biker, gets thrown up on the window of the bus.
Kia’s scantily clad women “robots” put this ad in the sexist category. One of the robots kicked a man, earning it violent points, too.
While SodaStream made environmental points showing its machine that carbonates beverages, thus avoiding using cans and bottles, it wasn’t necessary to have a woman in a bikini operate the machine.
Since there isn’t any drama when you buy a car from Cars.com, for the commercial, the sales representative gives the two consumers a wolf cub, then the jealous wolf-mom walks in. Ha, ha.
In an ad for milk, The Rock races out to the street in his pajamas to pick up milk. He dodges bank robbers, angry lions, and traffic jams and ignores a kitten stuck in a tree.
In the Taco Bell ad, a group of seniors leave the retirement home for a night on the town. While some people thought their partying was funny, I thought it made older people look ridiculous.
In a Volkswagen ad, a white man’s car makes him so happy he speaks with a Jamaican accent. When the ad was released early, many people wondered if it was racist.
Dark and creepy:
Anheuser-Busch announced its new beer, Budweiser Black Crown, with two ads that were dark and creepy, featuring young, upscale people in dark clothing.
Bud Lite’s ads featured characters trying to get luck through voodoo. One man carried his living room chair to the voodoo master, Stevie Wonder.
In the Mercedes-Benz ad, an actor is going to sell his soul in exchange for a new Mercedes CLA as well as a rich lifestyle, which includes dating Kate Upton and dancing with Usher. However, the actor sees on a billboard stating that the price starts under $30,000, so he saves himself.
For other opinions on the ads, see The Washington Post article, “The Five Worst Super Bowl Commercials of 2013” and ABC’s “The Six Worst, or Most Talked About Super Bowl Ads This Year.”